A Mechanical Love Letter © By Anand Tambey
Dear “Simply Supported Beam” Dixit,
I’d become your fan [Fida], when I’d seen you dancing on the “Shop Floor”, on tunes of 1-2-3.
At times I get lost, completely in your beautiful “Front-View” [Face View] and my “Boiler’s” [Heart] “Pressure” [BP] increases more than “Gauge Pressure” [Normal].
Whenever I see your “Technical Drawings” [Profile Pictures on FB] and your appearance at “Stock” [Street], My “ Center of Gravity” dislocates, my legs trembles and I lose balance. I fall in love and literally too, rolling on the floor.
Whenever I thought to talk with you, my “Throttle Valve” [Throat] dries up and unable to utter a single word. If I do not see you every other day, it becomes an “Ultimate Stress” position for me. [Nervous Breakdown]
I know your father “Gear Rack” and mother “Pinion [Driver Gear]” do not like me. Those naughty & small sisters of you “Roller Bearings” and your brother “Piston” always revolves around you like a rotating “Camshaft”. How can I approach you and confess my true love?
I guess, today the right time had come and I am saying this for now and forever.
I Love You.
Please do not reject my “Bill of Material” [Proposal Letter] and meet me at the “Tail Stock” of “Lathe Machine” [Backyard of House]. If we convert into a “Conjugate Beam” [Marriage], then very cute “Bearings” and “Cams” will play in our “Workshop” [Home & Garden]. It would be so much fun, right.
If you reject it, I will jump into “Smithy Hearth” or “Rolling Mill” to end my life.
And then you might have to “Bend” under “Load” of relatives-n-family and to finally “Sag” because of pressure, to marry any other Lever [Guy], but not me.
Mechanically & Always & DynamicalLY Yours:-
“Canti-Lever” Fida Hussain
PS - Written this Mechanical love letter, during college days and finer/improvised version, is here.